My best friend Hermione Granger
by ILUVRONWEASLEY
Summary: ONE SHOT. This is my pathetic attempt at being funny. It's kind of funny and kind of romantic, from Ginny's point of view but it's a DMHG fic. I don't mind constructive critism, but please don't review just to say that it isn't funny!


Hello! This is a short One-Shot (meaning that there will be no updates) and is from Ginny's point of view about her best friend, Hermione Granger. All of our beloved characters have grown up and left Hogwarts. Most of them are married. **This is a Draco and Hermione fic!** So if you aren't a fan of them, then you're welcome to read it anyway and give me your opinion. Well, hope you enjoy!

_DISCLAIMER: I own none of these wonderful creations; only the lovely J.K. has the privilege of owning them. _

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**MY BEST FRIEND HERMIONE GRANGER: By ILUVRONWEASLEY. **

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Hermione Granger's my best friend.

I'm her best friend too, even more so than Harry and Ron. She was so intelligent - or so I thought. She isn't dumb, mind you, she's just so _stupid_ and _foolish_ to go and marry that git.

That spoiled conceited jerk.

That filthy little ferret.

That rat faced, big-egoed, scrawny little Death Eater.

Yes, you've guessed it - _Malfoy_.

They got married about a month after the war with You-Know-Who ended (so I still can't say his name, what's it to you?). Harry beat him, _of course_. We all knew that Harry would defeat the nasty man anyway. He's getting married soon too. To whom you ask? Me, of course! I'm so happy! I think I might squeal.

Anyway, back to Hermione.

It turned out that she had been having a secret relationship with Malfoy for about…how long was it again? Erm…let's see…two years? I don't know, she didn't exactly tell me, did she?

Well, as soon as the war ended, Malfoy proposed - in front of everyone and they were all still surrounded by those dead bodies too! We were all a bit like, "_You must be crazy Malfoy! Hermione would never marry you!_" and "_That spell must have hit you harder than I thought!_" or "_Bog off Malfoy_!" or maybe even "_THIS IS GOING TO BE HEADLINE NEWS!_" from a random Daily Prophet reporter (whom I promptly hexed).

But when she accepted the diamond ring (_I_ didn't get a diamond ring for my engagement) we all wondered why. _And then_ she explained what had been going on between her and that prat.

We were all speechless but we were happy for her, I guess. My brother, Ron, got all worked up (how could Lavender marry him?) about the fact that Malfoy had nearly killed most of them in the war and he was still a Death Eater. Hermione didn't seem to mind though.

You see - Malfoy's trial was yesterday. We were all there because of Hermione. She's expecting! About two months pregnant, she is (Ron looked like he was going to throw up when she told us. He was like, "_No! Hermione can't sleep with the enemy_!").

Malfoy was pleading not guilty and we were all quite surprised that they actually had no evidence of Malfoy using an Unforgivable Curse. They had proof that he'd:

1/ Harmed many muggles that were in his way, but there were no serious injuries.

2/ The dark mark proved that he was a Death Eater (obviously).

3/ And that he had kicked a fellow Death Eater (known as Blaise Zabini) in the you-know-what because he got seriously annoyed with him.

But apart from that, he had done nothing much wrong. Plus, the fact that he had a wife now (a muggle-born one, no less) and was expecting a child in less than a year, made them take mercy. They said that he was going to be released with a warning and a Ministry member (which they hinted was most definitely going to be my dad) would visit his Manor to check up on him.

Hermione was so happy she couldn't stop crying!

You wonder where they are now? They're living in Malfoy Manor at the moment and Hermione is being taken care of so well! She doesn't have to do anything. Harry has _so_ much money and yet doesn't spend an ounce of it on a servant or house-elf or anything. _I_ have to do _all_ the chores.

Not that I'm complaining or anything.

Nope. Not complaining.

But Malfoy and Hermione are very happy together. Hermione says it's like a dream come true. She used to hate him because of his arrogance and vanity (amongst other things) but now she finds that attractive.

Personally, I think she's gone mad.

They're always so lovey dovey around each other - snogging each other in public, you know the sort. Malfoy's always got his hand on her butt. It's rather sickening really; even Harry and I don't do that _in public_. Sometimes, I just feel like shouting, "_Get a room!"_ but I don't because she's my friend.

In case you were wondering, Malfoy's exactly the same as he was at Hogwarts, except he doesn't mind muggle-borns now (obviously because of Hermione), but he still calls my Harry, 'Potter', and he still calls me 'Little Weasley', or 'Potter's girl', and we all still call him Malfoy.

He doesn't seem to mind now though. All I can say is that at least he's stopped calling Harry, 'Potty', and Ron, 'Weasel'.

Speaking of Ron, you should see what he's like now. That idiot, he can't even look Hermione in the face or at her stomach because he says looking at her face reminds him of Malfoy and looking at her stomach reminds him of Malfoy Junior! Haha, it's cruel but it _is_ rather amusing watching him around her…

So, I guess that ends my story of my best friend Hermione Granger and her lover boy, the arrogant, evil, conceited, spoilt, vain etc. etc. etc. jerk of a husband.

It's rather cute if you think about it…but then again it's rather sickening if you think about it too much…

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So, that was my silly attempt at being Ginny _and_ being humorous at the same time. Please read and review, and tell me what you think!

With love,

**ILUVRONWEASLEY**

PS. This has been edited for the _fourth_ time (14th November 2005) and once again the plot hasn't changed to fit in with book six (_Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince)_ but has just been edited for spelling errors, grammatical errors and that sort.

Also, I'm aware that all characters are OOC. Please forgive me!


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